Ok so here goes a new blog journey for me. I am back with hopefully a good and fun blog. If not then all I can say is that I am giving it a try….  I have a boyfriend. He is a real pain in the butt if you know what I mean. He likes to do things like hold my hand, calls me for no reason at all, surprises me all the time with little and big things, always kisses me good bye and tells me that he loves me, cooks for me, helps me clean, takes time to listen to me, talks to me, and just holds and cuddles with me and I just do not know what to do with a guy like that.  I never had a guy like that!  or  A guy like this guy!  I admit that I am in love. I feel like the girl in Jerry MaGauire where she gushes “I love him, I love him, I really do love him.” Yeah I am probably that bad. He knows everything about me. He knows that I am grumpy when I have not had my sleep, and I can bite his head off if he tries to talk about anything serious before my first POT of coffee. He knows I am a procrastinator, he knows my weakness for small dogs, children and old people, and flowers and trees, and birds and all manners of living critters.  He knows not to leave chocolate anywhere near me, because it will disappear in an instant. He knows I love to talk and talk and talk. He knows that I am a pushover and he refuses to stand by and let me be pushed over. He knows me better than I know myself and that is just awesome.  I can never really get one over on him, and believe me I try, but it is like he has this second eye or something. It is as if he always knows what I am thinking, scheming or trying to conive…. Example… Birthday party… He knew it was coming. I don’t know how he knew, but the man knew. What did he do… He put me in the car and we went away for his birthday. Yep… took me right out of the party! Thankfully the details and plans were not set in stone and were flexible so it was easy to put off, but geeeze…. and Christmas last year…. I went to get him the tv that he wanted only to find that he had already bought the tv that he wanted!  He knows all of my good qualities too. Like I am loyal and loving and I always laugh with him and not at him, (Usually) and I am his best friend and nobody will ever love him like I love him. He knows that I am going to listen to him even if I don’t like what he has to say, I will still listen, he knows that I will always ask his advise and he knows that I will always give him my best advice.  Does this all mean that we are the perfect couple, that we never fight? Of course not.  Let me tell you that we can go at it nose to nose and both of us will come to a stand still and not give in…..  Am I afraid that he will hit me, hurt me, push me, slap me?  No.  He will walk away and give me the silent treatment for a week before he would hurt me. But hurt me he does because he knows that by not talking to me, or responding to me hurts me more than if he were ever to hit me. If that makes sense.  He is not embarrassed to kiss me in public or in front of my friends. He even says I love you in front of people when I need to leave or he needs to leave. He remembers my birthday, and he is very romantic and he loves all the holidays, but 4th of July is his favorite. I think it is really Christmas but he does not like to show it… of course that is my opinion.  But it is the other moments that reminds me of why I love him.  I come home from a bad day, I am tired, all I want is just some little quiet time. He will cook me dinner, draw me a bath, pour me a glass of wine or if I lay down, he will close the door so I can rest.  If something happens that stresses me out, or upsets me, he does not hound me. He will let me tell it when I am ready. He is patient and kind and loving when I need it.  I cannot say that I am all of the things he is to me when he needs me to be. I wish that it would occur to me to be as kind and patient and loving but it doesn’t. I am just to full of…. do this, do that, what do you think of this or that, or what ever, and bless his heart he never says… “Hey can you just be here for me?” and when I do realize he needs some TLC he has already moved on and I feel like an idiot, a slug, an incompassionate ass…. and he loves me in spite of this huge huge flaw.  We have talked of the M word and that is not where we are right now. That is not where I Am right now. I may never get there again and he is alright with that. He would march me down the isle today if that was what I wanted, but he knows that I have this underlying issue with that particular commitment. And I am ok to take the blame for not hitting the church for a walk down the isle. He knows that I love him as much now as I would if we had a piece of paper stating us as man and wife. He is not perfect by any means. Let me tell you… He snores, he is opioninated, he is very vocal, and stubborn as a mule. He has selective hearing when it comes to things that he does not want to hear or do, and he needs a to do list for his to do list. He is not a picky eater, but he should be because he thinks that man can live with meat and potatoes alone. He loves Chinese food but will forego it because I have a severe shellfish allergy, but seems to forget that Long John Silvers fries their fish in the same oil that they fry their shrimp and I am still just as allergic. He thinks that my bed is for the dogs too. They can take up the whole bed and it is just fine because they need a place to rest. Forget me, crawl in if I can find a spot, but otherwise the babies come first! (I can’t really fault him on that since I let them sleep with me too but I can still blame him because this is my blog).  But at the end of the day, when all is said and done, when he pulls up in the drive way, walks in the door and greets me with a smile and a kiss, I will get all starry eyed, the butterflies in my stomach will flutter, my palms will get all sweaty and I will be just like that Jerry MaGuire girl…. “I love him, I love him, I really do…..”


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