Well I had a great day. After I rummaged thru the cupboards I found coffee filters and I was estatic. I had the means to fix myself a nice strong pot of coffee. After I had that going on I finally gave in to the crazy dog who continued to stand at the door and whine so I said ok one last time and if you do not go this is your last chance.
I got his leash on him and normally I will tell him to sit or stay and he is usally pretty good about that, but this morning I was really into lecturing mode.
The conversation went something like this:
“Alright Bandit this is your last chance. You have marked every square inch of this damn yard and you cannot tell me that you don’t know every damn tree that you have pissed on and if you don’t go and piss then I am going to drag your worthless butt into the house and you can just stay inside and if you decide that you want to pee in the house……”
My mistake was that I was too busy running my mouth and opened the door where he spotted something, (I think it was a squirrel) and he bolted and I flew out the door and landed on my ass where I twisted my ankle and in the process I let go of the chain and I am sure that you have guessed by now…. Doggy went byebye.
I couldn’t chase him and even if I could have I am not sure that I would have at this moment. That dog had me up at 3:45 this morning and wanted to go out every ten minutes.
Thankfully Deanna spotted him in the neighbors yard and she opened the gate, the dog ran inside and she shut the gate and I have the beast back.
Then I decided to go and lay down for a while and I slept hard for like 3 hours and it was great. I needed the snooze. While I was sleeping the man that was working on my car stopped by and finally after 3 days I have my car back.
So Matt, Deanna, the baby and I hit Taco Bell and Radio Shack and Big Lots, then came home. Well we stopped for gas and cigarettes and by the time that I had reached the store I was in a really bitchy mood towards Matt and I had to ananlyze my reaction and believe me, I don’t like going there, but it had to be done.
The thing is I love my son dearly but he is sooooooooo much like Robert I just…go stupid sometimes. I try to reason to my self and say…
“Self, your son is not his father and you have to stop letting the way he walks, talks, thinks and acts irritate you. You have to stop thinking of him as his fathers son and start thinking of him as his own PERSON”
Ha!!!! How in the hell do I do that when I feel like I have been tossed back 20 years ago into …. No it is not that bad. Matt is a wonderful father, a generous and loving husband, a wonderful and considerate son, but sometimes he does things that reminds me of my ex and I get a little nuts.
Not big things either, just the small ones and I am like… How can that be? Genetics are strange and I do not have the answers so I will just have to look the other way and control my irritation because it is so unfair of me to shout “YOU ARE JUST LIKE YOUR FATHER.”
Where he then shouts back at me “AND YOUR NEVER GONNA LET ME FORGET IT EITHER ARE YOU.”
So I said I am sorry and all is forgiven at least for the next few hours on both sides because he has gone to bed so he can get up for work in the morning. So he isn’t giving me a second thought and that is good.
So I should go and head that way myself and read a nice book and try and relax. Not that I will be able to I am sure, but it is worth a try….